Two more lonely people
by BurningxRedxCaskett
Summary: she remembers is McGee getting up off the floor and fighting off multiple men, and Saleem getting killed by a sniper by the name of Gibbs.
1. Today was a Fairytale

**Authors Note:** Here is a new story for you all to read...Don't get too excited, I don't know how frequent the updates will be, but I hope you will give this story a chance. It will be Tiva in time, but I have to work on getting them to 'that point'.

Each chapter will have a verse or chorus of a song, and each chapter will be named after the song in which the verse comes from.

Reviews are love, leave some.

**Song:** Today was a Fairytale by Taylor Swift

**DISCLAIMER: NOT MINE!**

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_Today was a fairytale  
You were the prince  
I used to be a damsel in distress  
You took me by the hand and you picked me up at six  
Today was a fairytale_

Ziva David was never the type of girl who would need saving. But the day she walked into NCIS, she was in for a whole new lifestyle. She was introduced to several new faces, and was put on many different assignments.

Her new team was quickly growing on her. There was her boss, Leroy Jethro Gibbs-or just Gibbs for short. He was a hard headed and very caring man on the inside, but he always managed to keep his exterior gruff and at most times, unwelcoming.

Timothy McGee was your all around computer whiz; there were several occasions when he would save her computer from being blown to bits.

Anthony DiNozzo was just a big kid. He was always in for a laugh and they would banter back and forth many times about nothing.

She never realized how protective of her Tony was until it came to her boyfriend Michael Rifkin. Tony never liked Michael, or the fact that he is from the same agency which Ziva transferred from-Mossad. The night Tony shot Michael; she made the decision to move back to her home country of Israel. Joining forces with her old team, and her father, the Director of Mossad, Ziva set out to find herself after losing someone she loved. Her team was assigned to take out a terrorist cell based in Somalia. Ziva's decision to take to the camp on her own ultimately led to her capture.

Sitting in her cell, she prepared herself for death. Knowing her father wouldn't send any of his men into Saleem's camp, and knowing her old team at NCIS had probably long forgotten about her by now, she was ready for death to come.

She was, by now, used to the torture she received by Saleem and his men. They storm in each taking a whack at her, and one man puts a bag over her head and roughly picks her up by her bound arms. _'This is it; they are going to kill me.'_

She hears a door open and is roughly placed in a chair. She hangs her head, and hears Saleem's voice, and as another man begins to speak, she tries to snap her weak head up, but fails. It's only when Saleem takes the bag off of her head she lifts it, bringing her eyes in contact with a man whom she had hoped would have forgotten about her-even though her thoughts were always filled with him.

Tony.

She takes in his face, and the small childlike smile that graces his lips as he looks at her. She would give anything to fall into his arms, and sob. She knows now that she was wrong in accusing him of purposely killing Michael, she knows now that Tony wasn't jealous, but was looking out for her as he always does.

After Saleem leaves, she looks up at him and says in a hoarse voice, "Out of everyone in the world who could have found me; it had to be you?"

He nods a slight victory smile on his lips and answers, "You're welcome. Are you glad to see me?"

She shakes her head softly, "You should not have come."

"Alright then, good catching up. I'll be going now," he mock stands, but doesn't get far because of his restraints. "Oh, yeah I forgot-taken prisoner."

Not taking her eyes off of Tony, she directs her question to the man who is lying in a seemingly unconscious state behind her. "Are you alright, McGee?"

Opening his eyes, he turns his head towards her, "Just glad you're alive."

She takes in McGee's words, and gazes at Tony. "You thought I was dead?"

Tony nods, "Oh, oh yeah."

"Then why are you here?" she finally asks.

"McGee-McGee didn't think you were dead-"

"Tony! Why are you here?"

He struggles against the serum that Saleem gave him, "Couldn't live without you-I guess."

She fights back a smile of adoration at his words. Whatever she feels towards the man in front of her, she ignores it and says, "So you will die with me? You should have left me alone."

"Okay, tried. Couldn't. Listen, you should now that I've taken some kind of truth serum so if there's any questions you don't wanna know the answers to-"

"I did not ask for anyone to put themselves in harm's way for me."

The next few minutes are a complete blur. All she remembers is McGee getting up off the floor and fighting off multiple men, and Saleem getting killed by a sniper by the name of Gibbs. McGee helps untie Ziva and Tony, and the two men support Ziva in between them and round the corner to be met by a gun man of Saleem's. They watch as the man falls to his death and Gibbs comes into view.

Gibbs looks directly at her as he speaks the words she's waited to hear for months. "Let's go home."

The flight back to Washington was quieter than she had expected it to be. She kept her head down the majority of the time, afraid that if she closed her eyes she would back in the cell near death. She drank the water she was given and ate the food placed before her. But she never once made eye contact with her old team and the people she believed to be her friends a few short months ago.

As Ziva steps off the elevator she is soon engulfed in a hug from Abby, at first she doesn't know how to react, still weak from malnourishment, but she slowly lifts her arms around Abby, hearing the scientist whisper that she was worried about her and how she is glad she is home safe.

She's home safe, and for some reason, she has a feeling that she will soon be having to face the problems which caused her to leave DC, NCIS and Tony.


	2. Another Shoulder at the Wheel

**Authors Note: **Hey guys, I hope you all are still interested in this story. I'm sorry it has taken so long to update, but I have been rather busy with work and such. Here is the next chapter. As I said before, I do not know how frequent the updates will be, so please, bare with me.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own NCIS, yadda yadda yadda. I do not own the song, blah blah blah. Don't sue!

**Song:** Another Shoulder at the Wheel by Jo Dee Messina

Reviews are love, leave some!

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_In my path there's stones I could never roll away alone  
There are times when I wake and my knees will tremble and shake  
But there's someone who cares  
And when I need you, you'll be there_

She's been home for a little over a month. She admits that being back home wasn't everything she thought it would be. Sure, everyone has been wonderful aiding in her long quest to get back to who she was; but she feels like she isn't making any progress. The entire team takes turns staying at her apartment with her-in a way she hates being watched over like she's a child, but at the same time she is glad that she has people here who care about her. She's never really known the love of a father until Gibbs; the love of a best friend until she met Abby; the love of a big brother until she met McGee; the love of a grandfather until she met Ducky.

When she met Tony she thought he was cockiest man she'd ever met, but even then she couldn't stop herself from falling in love with the Senior Field Agent. As she lies in bed trying to fall asleep, she can't get his face out of her mind. It also doesn't help that tonight is his night to 'babysit' her-after all, he is right down the hall. Giving in to the sleep that calls her, she drifts off to a not so peaceful sleep.

Her dreams are filled with events of a year ago; only this time the situation is reversed. Michael killed Tony. She swears the dream is real, so real that she can't force herself to wake up. She lets it play out. The events leading up to when she rushes into her apartment are the same; opening the door, gun drawn, she is staring down the barrel of Rivkin's gun, she catches a glimpse of Tony, and everything she's ever felt for the man bleeding on the floor starts to over flow. She pulls out her cell and calls for an ambulance and then calls Gibbs so he can arrest Rivkin-if she deals with him, there won't be a man left for Gibbs to take in.

"_Ziva-?" Michael asks, as she rushes over and kneels beside Tony._

"_Do not even think you can talk to me Michael!" she shouts, he keeps trying to tell her that all he wanted to do was talk, and that Tony attacked him first, but she's not buying it. "Tony would not attack you first, not unless you did something that was worthy of him too."_

Before he has a chance to say anything, Gibbs comes barging through the door, cuffing the man she thought she knew. She turns her attention back to the man on her floor, his eyes are open, and he's staring at her.

"_What were you thinking, Tony?" she whispers as the medics come in with a stretcher. She backs up so they can do their job, and takes Tony's hand as he is secured. _

_Tony lightly squeezes her hand and tries to be sweet, "You deserve better than him, Ziva. You deserve to be treated like a princess, and he wasn't treating you right. You were nothing to him-you should have heard the way he was talking about you. I wanted to kill him for his words about you." He takes a breath before closing his eyes, "Looks like he beat me to it."_

"_No! You cannot die, Tony," Ziva cries, running a hand through his matted hair, not minding if his blood is on her hands, "I need you, Tony! Do not die!"_

Her dream flashes and she's standing outside the door of the 'Restricted' section of the hospital. Tony had been in surgery for over an hour and she's going crazy. She will never forgive Rivkin if anything happens to Tony. She never knew how much she needed him until he's being ripped from her. A doctor comes out, telling her that she's lost him forever. Hyperventilating, she slides down the wall landing on the floor. The feel of arms wraps around her and she can hear the calming voice of a man. He's shaking her, calling her name.

"_Ziva!" he says, "wake up, Ziva!"_

She bolts up in bed, looking around the softly lit room, her breath still coming in uneven puffs. Her eyes finally focus on the man who was waking her, and she can feel her body start to relax. Before she's even sure of what she's doing, she throws her arms around him, hiding her face in his neck. She can feel him hesitate for a moment, but soon he hugs her back.

He rubs light circles on her back, "its ok, Ziva. You're fine."

At this, she only holds him closer, "but you were not, fine, Tony."

"What are you talking about?"

"It was you," she whispers. "The night that Michael died; it was you, not him."

He holds her tighter to him, "I'm fine, Ziva. I'm alive."

She nods, "It felt so real, Tony. Every word you said to me, every touch; it felt real."

He holds her by her shoulders, and looks her in the eye. "Listen to me, Ziva. I'm not leaving, okay. I'm not going to leave you. I'm always going to be here."

"You cannot know that, Tony. Especially in our line of work; something could happen to you, and where would that leave me? I would be alone again, and in pain."

He pushes a strand of hair out of her eyes, and grins at her, "Then I guess it's a good thing my partner is Ninja." He sees the faintest of smiles start to appear, and he cups her cheek with his hand, rubbing lightly with his thumb. "Come here," he whispers, pulling her to him once more. He kisses her forehead softly. "I promise you, nothing will happen. Go back to sleep, Ziva."

As he stands from the bed, she reaches out and grabs his hand. He turns to face her, a questioning look on his face. "Stay with me?"

He nods, and walks to the other side of her bed, lifting the covers and climbing in. She turns to face him, just to make sure he's really there. He lifts his arm and she accepts the invitation and scoots closer to him, resting her head on his warm chest. She smiles softly to herself as she feels his arm wrap around her shoulders and him kiss the top of her head. "Sweet dreams, Ninja," he whispers into the dark once her breathing became even.

Soon though, he can feel her squirm and hear her softly call out his name, no doubt having another nightmare. He whispers softly to her, "I'm fine, Ziva. Shh." Almost instantly she calms down, and gets closer to him.


	3. It Gets Better

**Authors Note: **Hello, all, I hope you enjoy this chapter. There is a bit of everyone in this installment.

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 2

**Song:** It Gets Better by Jo Dee Messina

Reviews are love, leave some!

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_I've felt the chill of this world cut down to the bone  
I've walked many a mile down this road on my own  
I've been through hell on my knees  
Come face to face with the devil  
And I know that it's hard to believe  
But it gets better_

"How are you doing today, Ziva?" her assigned psychiatrist asks, at the start of their session.

Sitting stubbornly on the couch across from her she has her legs crossed, hands resting in her lap. She looks down before answering her. "The dream came back," she whispers.

"The one about your partner dying?" she asks, she confirms with a nod. "When was this?"

"Last night. It was Tony's night to watch over me. The dream felt real, and when he woke me up I was panicking."

The doctor nods, "What happened after that?"

"I told him what happened, and that everything felt real," she begins, not sure if she wants to tell this woman, that she is _forced_ to talk to every other day, about Tony comforting her, and how she woke up in his arms that morning-maybe she'll leave that part out. "He assured me that nothing was going to happen to him; that he will be fine. I told him that with our job, there is a very real possibility that he could die, and I would lose him." She smiles at the memory of putting his faith in her, "He told me that it is a good thing that his partner is a 'Ninja'. I do not know how I feel about him trusting me as much as he does. Look at me? Should he be talking to someone who has a shrunken head?"

The doctor smiles at her error and politely corrects her, "I believe you mean 'who is getting their head shrunk'." Writing something on the pad of paper she has next to her, she continues, "Why do you feel that he shouldn't trust you? The fact that you need to speak to me about your ordeal?"

She blinks a few times, and with a shrug of her shoulders she answers, "It does not seem like a good idea right now. If I can barely get through a night of sleep, how could I possibly protect him in the field? Especially since I have no idea when I will be able to go back; I am not crazy. He is for trusting me as much as he does right now." She takes a deep breath and looks up at the woman across from her. "Right?"

"Ziva, it seems as though your partner still trusts you because he knows you. He knows that you are strong enough to find your way back to who you are supposed to be. He believes in you, Ms. David."

The session with her shrink comes to an end, and she leaves the office. She doesn't know what good these visits with her will do, she doesn't feel any different than when they first started. She hates that everyone says 'this will take time'. She's never been a patient person. She sits down on a bench outside of the NCIS building, and gets lost in her thoughts, so lost that she doesn't register that someone has seated themselves next to her.

"How're you doing, Ziva?"

Turning to be met with the boyish face of Tim McGee, Ziva paints on her best fake smile. "I am fine, McGee. How are you?"

"Good, good," the man nods, sips his coffee. "We all want you back on the team soon. It's not the same without you."

Ziva shakes her head, "I am not ready to be back in the field yet. The 'head doctor' has to sign a release saying that I am stable. But she is not certain that I am, and right now I think she is right; no matter how much sitting at a desk is torturing me."

Tim chuckles softly, "You'll be back soon enough. I believe in you, so does Gibbs and Tony."

She takes a deep breath then lets it out, "I am still not sure why you believe in me so much. If I have not been able to pass the psych eval, then there is clearly something wrong with me, yes?"

Tim shakes his head 'no', "I don't believe that there is anything wrong with you, Ziva. I believe in your ability to bounce back; you're strong, you can handle anything. You need to talk it out, and once you do you'll see that everything will be back to how it was before." Tim puts a comforting hand on her arm, "It's just going to take some time, that's all."

Ziva smiles softly at the man next to her, "I suppose you are right. I just wish that it would not take as long."

_-NCIS—_

Standing beside the door, she locks it and tries to hold her composure when Tony begins singing to himself as he is going to the bathroom. It takes him a moment, but he soon senses her presence in the room, and catches her eye in the mirror.

"How long have you been standing there?" he asks, as he's finishing his business.

She shrugs, and tries to be witty, "Long enough to see that you are well hydrated after your time in the desert."

Zipping his pants and walking over to wash his hands, he keeps his eye on her in the mirror, "You've been avoiding me since you woke up."

"I was not sure what to say."

"But you were sure it had to be said in the men's room?"

She walks over and leans against the counter, "I was sure it had to be said." She watches as he dries his hands and doesn't turn to look at her. She came in here to get everything off her chest, and that is what she is going to do. "When you shot Michael, I almost killed you where you stood."

"I wasn't standing," he retorts, tossing the waded up paper towel in the trash on the other side of her.

"No you weren't. You were lying on the ground; without adequate back up completely violating protocol-"

"And double parked."

"Yes," she says, turning to face him, "I noticed. But that does not matter. Just like it does not matter how it worked out, for Michael."

"So what does?" Tony asks, trying to keep his own emotions in check.

She puts one hand in front of him, and tilts her head so she can at least try to look him in the eye, "That you had my back. That you have always had my back; and that I was wrong to question your motives."

The question he has been wanting answered for the longest time rolls off his tongue, "So why did you?"

"I trusted my bother Ari, I trusted Michael," she says, and then looks up at him, "I could not afford to trust you."

Finally, Tony turns to look at the woman, with the makings of a smirk on his face; she looks back up at him, her eyes instantly getting lost in his. "I thought you weren't sure what to say?" he teases.

She gives a small shrug, "I guess I had a lot of time to think about things."

"I'm sorry, Ziva."

She moves so she is standing before him, and shakes her head, "No, it is I, who am sorry."

What she intends to be a friendly kiss on the cheek, turns into something much more meaningful. She places her hand on his cheek, and as she moves to place her lips on the opposite cheek, he turns his head and captures her lips with his. She's momentarily stunned, but kiss him back before the reasonable side of her screams at her to stop.

Pulling away, she drops her hand, "You should not have done that, Tony."

"I wanted to," he whispers. "Didn't you feel it, Ziva? I don't want to fight my feelings anymore; I've been fighting them for too long, and I lose the fight every time you walk into the room."

Ziva shakes her head, "Tony, not now. I am not in a good place. Please, do not do that again."

Before he has a chance to grab her or say something to stop her, she is gone; not looking back at the broken man she left in her wake.

_-NCIS—_

Before she goes home, she has another stop to make, she has to clear the air with Gibbs. When she decided to stay with her father in Israel, she gave her Boss an ultimatum, knowing that he doesn't like them. She told him in a few words that it was either her or Tony that had to be transferred to a different team.

She watched Gibbs turn his back on her and get back on the plane to the States without so much as looking back until he was seated. Deciding to stay with her father was a tough decision. Since joining NCIS she has seen what good people are all about; and that Mossad was just about being two faced liars like her brother Ari. A part of her will always love him; he was her big brother, but he didn't think twice about who he killed. He had killed Kate without batting an eye and without a reason. She was just a way for him to get to Gibbs, and Ziva had to take him out before he could kill anyone else.

This is what she explains to Gibbs, she tells him that of course she would lie in order to protect her brother. Gibbs was nothing to her until she truly got to know him, now she would do anything to protect the one man who seems to never need any protection for anyone.

"All I am asking for, is a second chance, Gibbs," she says, then looks back up at him. "I promise you, I will not disappoint you again. That is the last thing I want to do, I respect you too much to have you doubt me."

Gibbs' stone cold eyes bore into her, and her answer is a nod, "I know, Ziva. I'll see you at the office tomorrow morning."

She smiles a real smile for the first time since she's been home, "Thank you, Gibbs."


	4. Back to December

**Authors Note:** Hey guys! Here is the long awaited update...lots of talking in this chapter. I hope you all enjoy it! I've been able to get a lot of writing done over the last 24 hours...my friend's wireless internet is down and I do all my writing on my lap top, so yay for no distractions! lol

Reviews are love, leave some!

Krystle

**Song: **Back to December by Taylor Swift

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Ziva stares blankly at the wall across from her; her talk with Tony in the men's room replaying over and over in her head. He kissed her; it was supposed to be just a simple peck on the cheek, but no, he had to go and complicate things for her. He knows that she can barely sleep through the night-although waking up in his arms was amazing, she can't let herself fall for him…well, fall harder for him. Gibbs has rules, and the last thing she wants to do is upset him again. No matter how bogus the rules seem to her, he's made them for a reason-if not to protect his team then to protect him from the women of the agency.

_These days I haven't been sleeping  
Staying up, playing back myself leaving  
When your birthday passed and I didn't call  
Then I think about summer  
All the beautiful times I watched you laughing from the passenger side  
And realized I loved you in the fall_

There used to be a time when Ziva was fearless. She was never worried how things would turn out, or where she would end up if she chose a different path. The day she walked away from the team, she was also walking away from Tony. She never forgot the look on his face when he looked at her from the back of the plane that was carrying them from Tel Aviv back to DC. He was hurt and confused. Now she is the one who is confused and broken.

_And then the cold came, the dark days  
When fear crept into my mind  
You gave me all your love  
And all I gave you was goodbye_

Knocking on the door brings her from her thoughts. She doesn't know how long the person has been knocking on her door, but she can tell by the sound they are growing impatient. She rises and opens the door and looks up to the man on the other side.

"Tony?"

He gives her a soft smile, "Hi."

"It's late, what do you need?" she asks, still confused about what happened earlier.

He looks down at his watch and notes that it's a quarter after six. "I um, came to apologize for today. It was uncalled for."

She steps aside, letting him in. Closing the door behind him, she looks up at him with guarded eyes, "Go on."

"I'm not going to say that I regret kissing you," Tony says, giving her a small, hopeful smile. "Because I don't; but I shouldn't have let it happen, especially now. You're clearly not ready."

"Yes, that is true-"

Tony holds up a hand, "Just-please let me get this out before you speak, Ziva?" at her nod he continues. "What I regret is the day that you lost your trust in me. I can't say that I regret my actions, because I don't. I was protecting you-and I know that you're the last person who needs protecting, but what I found out about him…I was worried.

When we went to Israel, we were on your turf, and when you had me pinned to the ground, letting out your frustrations, the only thing I was worried about was you. I could care less about the pain in my shoulder, or the fact that you could have shot me. I was _always_ concerned about _you._ Leaving for the States without you was the hardest day I can remember. We were going home, and you were staying behind, because of me. I only hoped that this would have given you the time to heal, and to forgive me.

When I learned that you were on a ship and it went down in a storm, I couldn't breathe. I remember my heart pounding so fast that I thought it was going to explode, I just couldn't accept the thought of you being lost in a ship wreck. Looking into the mission you were sent on, and where the ship was at, and where you ended up, I knew…I just _knew_ that you had survived that stormy night.

When I purposely got captured with McGee to get to you, I wasn't scared. I knew that if I saw you once, then I could take any pain that that man could inflict on me because I knew you were alive. Everything that I told Saleem that day, every answer that I gave him, was the truth.

I have slowly been falling in love with you since you walked into NCIS the week after Kate was killed. There have been other women, Jeanne, and a few random relationships, but none of them hold a candle to you, Ziva. I shouldn't have kissed you when I did. I knew better. I knew that you'd run, but I couldn't hold back anymore.

I just had to tell you that; and I'm sorry that it happened the way it did."

Ziva looks up at him, his speech still sinking in. She's never heard him talk that much, and the man can talk about everything and nothing better than most women can. She blinks a couple of times, "Are you done? May I speak now?"

"Yes, I'm done," he answers.

_So this is me swallowing my pride  
Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night  
And I go back to December all the time._

"While I agree with you," she says, "about me not being ready for much of anything right now; I also agree that I have slowly been falling in love with you as well. These feelings are new to me, now that I fully accept them.

Since you rescued me, I have not known how to act around you. Maybe it's because of the time when I was captured, or maybe it is just me adjusting to being back in DC and safe with the people who really love me.

I do not have any answers for you right now, Tony. I-I am so messed up in my head, between my father and Saleem, I don't know which way is the right way anymore.

With our feelings having been established; once everything on my end is sorted out I hope we can have this conversation again, with a different outcome."

She looks up into his eyes, showing as much love and admiration for him as she can with her conflicted eyes. _He is smiling, this is a good thing, right?_ The smile that is on his face, she notices comes out only when he's truly happy about something. He's generally a happy person, but this smile is rare.

He slowly nods, "I'll wait for you, Ziva. Lord knows you've been waiting on me long enough."

"You-" she takes a breath, gathering her thoughts. "You are not mad?"

He shakes his head and slowly brings his arms around her. He can feel her tense, but just as quickly as she tensed up, she relaxed. He smiles into her hair when she wraps her arms around his middle. "No, Ziva, I'm not mad. I know you have a lot of things to sort through, and I want you when you're ready." He kisses the side of her head softly, breathing in her scent-strawberries quickly becoming his new favorite smell. "I'll be going now. See you tomorrow, Ziva."

"Tony," she calls, before he makes it half way to the door.

"Yeah?"

"Would you stay with me tonight?" she asks timidly. "I know it is not your turn to watch me, but I feel safer with you here."

He smiles softly at her and nods, "Sure, I'll call McGee and tell him not to come."

She nods and walks to her bedroom, a ghost of a smile appearing on her lips. The first smile she's smiled in a long time, and she has Tony to thank for it.

_It turns out freedom ain't nothin' but missing you_

_Wishin' I'd realized what I had when you were mine_

_I go back to December turn around and make it alright_

_I go back to December all the time_


End file.
